Jilted men rarely see it coming.
You might think that your relationship is as solid as a rock. But then you come home one day and her bags are packed.
She’s crying and saying it’s not you, it’s her. She says that there’s no one else, but the chances are there is. It’s over.
You can’t expect a woman to continue being interested in you if you’re not doing the work.
All too many men let things slide. They don’t realize that they have become lazy in the relationship. I’ve seen this happen a thousand times.
What’s worse is the fact that men often seem confused by what has happened. They have no clue what to do next.
Luckily, her losing interest doesn’t have to spell the end of your relationship. You can — and should — turn things around here.
Within this article, I want to share everything I’ve learned about waning passion and how you can bring it back into both of your lives.
The Science-Backed Reason That Compulsive, Obsessive ‘Love’ Does Not Last
“You can love someone so much… But you can never love people as much as you can miss them.”– John Green
Love can be elusive. When you first meet the woman that you want to spend your life with, you will know.
The moment that you touch her, nothing will be the same again. She gives you something that no woman has before now.
You’re excited to be with them, you can’t stop thinking about her, and you will do anything to keep her in your life no matter the cost.
If you’re in luck, she will feel the same. When love is reciprocated, she becomes the center of your universe. You can’t imagine your life without her.
Don’t get too comfortable. Love fades. Passion fades. The heightened emotions she has for you at the start won’t last forever.
There’s a reason that 46% of people in monogamous relationships cheat.
Women get bored. She loves the chase as much as you do. But when it stops — when she’s got you to herself — she is all too quick to start losing interest.
You’re not imagining it. There’s a scientific explanation for her lack of affection for you.
When she first fell in love, her hormones were at an all-time high. Her cortisol levels rose and so did her dopamine. She was getting that ‘hit’ from you every time she saw you.
Yes, your love and attention were like a drug to her. She was addicted to it — she needed it.
That’s when most guys get lazy.
You think it’s simple: You’ve got the girl. You’ve ticked that box. Now all you have to do is sit back and relax.
Nothing could be further from the truth. When you stop putting in the effort, she will notice. It can happen without you realizing it.
Slowly but surely, she will start to move away from you physically and emotionally.
Those hormone levels don’t stay the same.
Research suggests that hormone levels decrease over time after that initial ‘spark’ of being in love starts to disappear. It’s then that you will notice a change in her behavior.
You will no longer be her number one priority. You’ve taken a backseat in her life. So, how can you get back into the driver’s seat?
How to Tell When She’s Lost Interest in the Relationship
She didn’t lose interest overnight. This slide happened a little at a time. Day by day, she became less interested in you.
There were small signs that you might have missed along the way. Perhaps you got too complacent.
You believed her when she said that she would always be there. You trusted her when she said that you were the one that she loved.
You were wrong.
But it’s too late to think about that now. The woman that you thought you’d spend the rest of your life with is slipping away.
She doesn’t have the energy for you. You no longer have that closeness or connection that you shared. I’ve seen this happen to too many men before and it can be unexpectedly devastating.
Here are some of the signs to look for when a woman loses interest in a man.
1. She starts picking fights with you over nothing
Couples argue. Whenever you’re in a relationship with someone, you will argue with them.
There’s no way that you can spend that long together and not disagree. You might fight about the big stuff — marriage and kids — and that’s normal.
But if she’s started to pick fights over nothing at all, that could spell disaster for your dating future.
When women get frustrated in relationships, they will start to notice every one of your flaws.
That’s bad news. Before you know it, she will be bickering about nothing.
2. She acts like having sex with you is a chore
You don’t need me to tell you that sex is the foundation of a happy relationship.
When you first got together, chances are you couldn’t keep your hands off each other. While that naturally changes over time, if it vanishes completely, that could be a red flag.
If she treats sex like a favor she’s doing you, the rocks relationship is sure to be on the rocks.
Spoiler: She should want to have sex with you.
When you’re in love with someone, you want to express that in a physical way. When you’re attracted to someone, you want to express that by touching them.
Reigniting passion in your relationship starts with you. The way that you feel about yourself and your body will have a direct impact on how she perceives you.
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3. She stops showing you affection
It’s not just about sex. When women are dissatisfied with a relationship, you can wave goodbye to any show of affection.
Does she walk past you in the living room without so much as touching your arm? Has she stopped kissing you each morning and before you leave for work?
If she’s stopped showing you that she cares, she doesn’t. There’s rarely another reason for this type of behavior.
Her body language is speaking volumes to you.
4. She doesn’t factor you into her plans anymore
What is she doing this weekend? Where is she tonight? If you don’t know the answer to these questions, you might want to ask yourself why.
When she starts to lose interest in you, you will no longer be a part of her plans. She will start to emotionally and mentally distance herself from you — and she might not even realize that she’s doing it.
Women aren’t as complex as you might think. When they are unhappy, they start to move away from the source. If you’re not giving her what she needs socially, she will seek that out from her friends and family.
You might find that you’re no longer invited to dinner parties, that you’re not her plus-one at weddings, or even that she goes on vacation without you.
If you’re not the person she thinks of when making plans, there’s a reason.
5. She sends you one-word texts and never calls
Communication is important in any relationship — not least romantic ones.
When you first met her, you would send each other texts all day, every day. Perhaps you’d kick things off with a little ‘Morning, beautiful’ and then end the day with a ‘Night x’.
Whatever your particular style of communication, if you’ve noticed a difference, don’t ignore that sign.
Women are natural-born communicators, more than men are. She will want to share her thoughts and ideas with you as default.
The moment that stops, you can bet that she’s talking to someone else.
Even if you’re not the jealous type, that’s got to come as a real blow to your ego. The fact that she has traded in your attention for someone else’s.
How to Win Her Back When the Interest is Gone
She’s losing interest, and so it’s time to take action. The sooner you do something about the problem, the sooner you can solve it.
All too many men see the writing on the wall and merely hope that things will get better. They won’t.
If you ignore the issue now, you can be sure that your relationship won’t last the year. Here are some approaches you can try.
1. Don’t beg for her attention or you will look pathetic
The biggest mistake that men make when she starts to lose interest is this: they beg for attention.
You might ask her to spend more time with you. You might start asking where she is. You might question her and wonder why she doesn’t make plans with you.
All of the above will make you look desperate, pathetic, and lonely. That is sure to be a turn-off.
When you first met her, there was the chase.
You were both intrigued by each other but you couldn’t be sure that the other person was interested. That uncertainty was enough to keep both of your attention.
You want to bring that element back into the relationship now.
2. Do something that she doesn’t expect from you
Has your everyday life gotten dull and boring? Do you stick to the same old routine each day?
If the answer is yes, you owe it to yourself and your partner to switch things up. She thinks that she knows you inside and out… and, frankly, she’s over it now.
By doing something that doesn’t expect, you will remind her that there’s more to you than meets the eye. In the simplest of terms, it’s all about shaking things up and doing something new.
There are plenty of ways that you can get this right. You might want to try something new in the bedroom, take her on a spontaneous date night, or even book a last-minute vacation.
The fact that you’ve stepped outside of your comfort zone should be enough to show her that you have more surprises in store for her.
Think about what you can do to make her happy and interested.
3. Focus on rebuilding yourself physically and mentally
The sad truth of the matter is that men can let themselves go when they are in relationships.
You might subconsciously think that — because you don’t have any women to impress — you can stop working on yourself. That is a grave error.
When you give up, she will notice… and she won’t like what she sees. No wonder she’s losing interest in you.
Take the time to rebuild yourself both physically and mentally and learn how to be a man.
Yes, that means hitting the gym and eating well. It also means dressing well and practicing self-love.
You want other women to look at you, even if they can’t have you. It doesn’t end there. You also need to enhance yourself mentally and have a vision of the future for yourself.
4. Prove your value — through other women’s eyes
Women are competitive. If they think that another woman is interested in their man, they will want him more than ever.
That doesn’t mean that you should go out of your way to make your partner jealous.
However, by surrounding yourself with attractive women who value you, you can show her that you are worth her time.
You might want to get closer to certain co-workers, start spending time with female friends, or be friendly with her friends.
This approach will change the way she views you… and her interest levels will peak again.
If she’s losing interest in you, that could be a reflection of where you’re at in your life.
Often enough, men fail to reach their full potential. You might find that you slack when it comes to working or that you have given up on your physique.
Should that sound familiar, you need to change your ways, reclaim your masculine power and realize the future that you deserve.
You can roll over and take it. You can accept your fate and allow your relationship to slip away.
However, as I tell the men I work with them, there is another option available. By working on yourself and establishing the romantic connections you desire, you can change the narrative. You don’t have to be a beta man. This is your chance to become an alpha.
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