Where have all the great men gone?
Have you ever gotten the feeling that your life just isn’t what you thought it would be? Ever sat alone and thought about all of the glorious things you wanted to be as a kid… and wondered why it never happened?
Even now, do you feel unsatisfied, frustrated and tired of the monotony of life… yet you know that you could be so much more if you only had the chance?
“The mass of men live lives of quiet desperation.”
Look around you – this is as true now as it was back then.
Think about all of the exciting dreams and aspirations that you had when you were younger.
He longed to…
- Travel the world with the love of his life. But instead, he’s stuck at the office constantly promising or even lying to himself that once the next project is accomplished, then he will make time for adventure and his love life.
- Discover his mission in life and give his heart and soul to it, but he’s stuck doing work that doesn’t inspire him so that he can pay for a endless stream of bills, home upgrades, and keeping up with the jones.
- Wake up excited and on FIRE about the work that he gets to do each day, but instead, he feels tired and burnt out by the never-ending cycle of making more money that has become his entire life.
- To deepen his connection with himself and have the time and space to truly uncover who he is and what he wants in life. But instead, he’s stuck chasing society’s version of success and permanently pursuing the next vanity driven accomplishment.
He did everything right and wanted his life to be this amazing adventure, but here he sits…. stewing in traffic on the 101 freeway living a life of quiet desperation.
We live in a world where men are now more afraid than ever to act like men.
There is a serious problem here that men aren’t talking about. Instead we numb ourselves with instant gratification activities and mindless entertainments of the 21st century.
Where did all the powerful men go?
Why is it that the males are depicted today on TV as Homer Simpson, Al Bundy, and Peter Griffon…?
Men who drink endlessly, do drugs and degrade women.
Is this what we choose to glorify and have slowly become???
Where are the Julius Caesars…Winston Churchills… the Abraham Lincolns?
There is a silent disease among men today that no one seems to be talking about…
Did you know these startling statistics?
- The suicide rate for men is 3.5x higher than that of women? (Even very successful men like Robin Williams, Anthony Bourdain, and Heath Ledger fell victim to this horrible act)
- The divorce rate in the U.S hovers above 52%
- Men are 3x more likely to become alcohol and drug dependent – masking their problems rather than facing and solving them.
At this point, you’d think men would reach out for help, but because of the lie instilled by society that “real” men should be self-reliant and capable of handling their problems by themselves, men are far less likely to reach out for support.
So let’s clear something up right now…
Men’s coaching does not mean you are weak or incapable of doing something yourself.
Coaching allows you to grow faster by leveraging the guidance of someone with the perspective, experience and know how to get you where you desire to be.
Someone to hold you accountable – to give it to you straight and make sense of the chaos of life. To finally free you of the BS story that’s been holding you back for years.
Let’s be honest here:
Warren Buffet wouldn’t be the greatest investor of our time without Benjamin Graham…
Marcus Aurelius wouldn’t be one of the greatest philosophers, the Emperor of Rome, and one of the most successful generals in military history without Epictetus…
Michael Jordan wouldn’t be the greatest basketball player and (arguably) the greatest athlete of our time without Phil Jackson…
And it’s crazy to think that you’re any different.
If you want to be great – then you need help getting there.
Men more than ever need coaches to guide them to unleash their greatness in their life, career, and relationships.
Let’s dive into the 10 reasons why a men’s coach is the “secret edge” you’ve been searching for that will unlock nearly limitless power in your health, wealth, relationships, and personal growth.
1. You need someone to talk to who doesn’t just listen but helps you move forward
Therapists, counselors and psychiatrists will listen to you, give you drugs, and put you in a circle of other sobbing individuals who have not recovered from their pain and are still living in the past.
They don’t stand for your greatness, values or challenge you to become the strongest version of yourself. They allow you to play small and hide.
Truthfully you know within minutes of meeting your therapist, counselor or psychiatrist that they aren’t going to work. That they won’t get through to you and you secretly like it because you can keep doing what you’ve always done.
You still pay for it because it feels like you’re “trying” something and it’s now their fault you’re not getting better.
A men’s coach spots your bullshit before you open your mouth and you aren’t able to hide and play small any longer. You have to step up with your coach whereas therapists, counselors and psychologists let you get away with your BS, often childish behaviors that prevent you from moving forward in life.
Granted there are very good well meaning mental health professionals that exist, yet they’re hard to find. And after working with 1000s of men their feedback closely resembles this:
Counseling: let’s solve a short term issue and if I can’t solve it then I’ll refer you to one of the options below…
Therapy: let’s dig into your past and find ten other issues to focus on and once in a blue moon I’ll tell you what you need to do with little accountability or a clear plan of action.
Psychiatry: let’s get you hooked on this new drug and see if it works, if not I’ve got another drug for you – you’re actually a science experiment for these new drugs by the way – so sign here!
Men’s coach: let’s move forward and grow from this challenge. I understand where you’re coming from and I feel the pain you feel and have solved it for myself and many others without any drugs, taking years or costing you a fortune in healthcare.
Men’s coaches listen deeply, speak in truths and are more direct and action oriented to help you get a specific result so you can move forward and grow.
In this process, you learn that your past challenges if overcome are exactly what makes you a strong, grounded man after all.
Men’s coaches won’t let you hide from your challenges instead you’ll face them head on and grow stronger as a result.
2. You are a leaf in the wind without a purpose
You’re lost and have no idea what you’re really doing or WHY you’re doing it.
You follow the crowd aimlessly moving through life unconsciously.
You haven’t taken a step back and looked inward and asked yourself “what do I really want as a man in all aspects of my life?”
Because you haven’t done this you grind Monday through Friday and live for the weekends.
Vacations are your escape and alcohol and your drug of choice becomes your remedy to reduce the pain of not knowing who you are or where you’re going in life.
You tend to spend money on lavish external things like cars, clothes, and needless household items in the hopes of finding some tiny spurt of happiness – Because it’s artificial and superficial, it goes away the following week so you’re left in an endless cycle of consumption.
Every man needs a fight. Not physical, but a mission to fight for
“Your purpose in life is to find your purpose and give your whole heart and soul to it.” – Gautama Buddha
Something that’s greater than yourself and for some men possibly noble enough that it’s worth dying for.
A men’s coach empowers you to find your path and purpose and give your life more meaning. Now you wake up excited for the day enjoying higher levels of clarity, drive, and direction.
Life starts here.
3. Heavy Masculine Accountability
When a strong grounded man with absolute conviction asks you to do something – you do it.
Letting a men’s coach down is very different from letting your counselor down. There is a deeper respect and bond that’s developed with your men’s coach. It’s the masculine nature to be a man of your word. If you tell a strong grounded man you’ll do something and don’t – you’re breaking your word and bond with your coach.
It’s not about the money with the men’s coach it’s about being a man of integrity.
If your word means nothing… then are you really a powerful man?
When a man is held accountable by someone he deeply respects then he focuses harder and takes the right actions and gets positive and satisfying results.
You can’t hide.
You can’t play small.
You can’t live with the excuses that you’ve used for decades anymore.
The pain you feel when you let down someone you greatly respect will propel you into action. It’s a big reality check for you at that moment where your men’s coach is not buying into your little bullshit story.
You’ll be thinking in the back of your head, “He’s right. I can’t believe I’ve gotten away with this for this long and it’s time to change.”
“If you hang out with chickens, you’re going to cluck and if you hang out with eagles, you’re going to fly.” – Steve Maraboli
Any man can shy away from help because he’s afraid to look foolish yet it’s the truly strong and brave man who stands up and asks for support.
If you’re reading this article, then you’re already the type of man who surrounds himself with hustlers, high achievers and A-players.
But the problem is that you cannot always rely on these men for the real feedback and advice that you need to achieve your biggest breakthroughs and get to the next level in life.
Even though you and your peers are playing at a higher level than the average man, they still want to keep you at the same level. It’s just human nature. While they mean well and care about you and your success, just like crabs in a bucket pulling any escaping crabs back down they are terrified of watching you outgrow and outperform your existing social group
Having a men’s coach doesn’t make you weak or incapable it’s where you can get your edge against the crowd and your competition. It makes you smart for investing in yourself with a person who will help you become greater.
4. You did not have healthy masculine role models growing up
Like me, maybe your father wasn’t the best role model for you and therefore you lack a strong masculine identity.
This isn’t a put down of your father – he likely did the best he could with what he was given from his father.
- You may struggle with how to treat women (especially attractive women)…
- You may struggle standing up for yourself…
- You may avoid or put off conflicts so as not to “upset” anyone or cause any problems…
- This prevents you from getting your needs met as a man and often hides this deep frustration inside– where sometimes it uncontrollably explodes.
- You are a nice guy who does things in order to get people to like you. You don’t stand up for your own values because others’ approval is more important.
Men who experience this lean towards a more feminine nature which is beneficial at times. However, to be a great man, that masculine energy must be there too.
Balancing both the masculine and feminine energies is crucial.
It is more important than ever for you to have that masculine energy to get to the next level in your life, business and relationships.
The other side of this coin is the over-achiever guy. These men hustle hard to mask their pain and validate themselves through external success in work, creating wealth and buying flashy things like a house, car or name brand clothes. It can be a never ending cycle for decades to prove to others that you are worthy of respect, love and connection.
There’s nothing wrong with achievement – so long as you achieve for yourself and not to simply win the approval of others and silently say “look I am enough can’t you see my successes!”
With a men’s coach you have someone with real backbone to boost your masculinity and increase your confidence in a healthy mature way. You learn the right ways to get your needs met, speak your truth, and be respected by others and most importantly – yourself.
5. You give away your masculine power to women.
Woody Allen said, “90% of success is showing up.”
The problem is real men aren’t showing up in the world for women!
Men have lost the beauty of their masculine edge and women are starving for it.
A lot of men are intimidated by the concept of masculinity instead of embracing it as their own.
The modern man often feels weak and powerless; castrated by society and emasculated by women.
When you look at an attractive woman, you immediately start thinking of what it would be like to have sex with her. In your conversations and interactions, you’re constantly checking out her boobs, legs, butt and hips.
You’re not present with her at all – and she knows this.
You’re trying to “get” something from her rather than trying to build something with her.
She could tell you to do something and without question, you would bend over backward for her.
This behavior puts you at the mercy of women.
She owns you – and loses all respect for you.
She treats you like a little boy because that’s exactly how you’re acting. A physically big man with no inner backbone (one of the biggest turn offs to women).
The whole time she’s confused why you do this to yourself but of course she’ll happily take advantage of this opportunity to treat you like a boy – because that is what you’re telling her to do unconsciously.
Working with a men’s coach helps you regain your masculine power and become more respected and attractive to women.
A men’s coach not only helps you keep your masculine power… you multiply it and go from approval seeking Mr. nice guy to “wow who is that guy?”
6. You need someone other than your clueless friends and family to discuss women, dating and relationships.
Men’s coaches specialize in relationships in many ways. The masculine-feminine dynamic is likely why they became men’s coaches in the first place. Often many men’s coaches have backgrounds in dating, seduction and relationship coaching.
However, they’ve evolved into a healthier and more mature form of supporting men.
Your men’s coach is to relationships what a Navy SEAL is to combat.
He will teach you the proven strategies and and mental frameworks (that none of your family, friends, and peers know) so that you can transform into the type of man that women respect, admire, and brag about to their girlfriends.
If the intense satisfaction that comes from a deeper level of intimacy with women is what you want… you are not going to get it by listening to your single friend whose own relationship history is a natural disaster.
Your mother thinks you’re the best man alive yet doesn’t understand there’s also billions of other men out there competing for the same woman… and their mothers saying the same thing.
Other women just tell you to be yourself and be nice to women and the right one will come along – eventually. Yet nothing is working and time is only going by.
A men’s coach would first start with building up your confidence and self-love.
Then you identify your image of an “ideal” woman and relationship.
And what are you currently doing to meet this type of woman? Where are you hanging out? Is your ideal woman at these places?
Is your dream woman really attracted to who you are and your lifestyle?
Often men have a vision of who they want to be with but are searching for her in all the wrong places.
That’s if they’re searching at all.
This just piles on the rejection and erodes your confidence.
It’s like trying to sell ice to Eskimos… why the hell would they want it? Instead you need to sell your deliciously cool and satisfying ice on the sun baked beaches of Southern California!
Get the idea?
A men’s coach will work with you from the inside out and turn your dating life or existing relationship into something extraordinary. Your coach achieves this with proven practices that have worked for many men before you.
You don’t have to struggle being single or in a relationship any longer with a men’s coach.
7. The freedom to express oneself fully.
At the core of every man is the desire to be free yet ironically men often confine themselves to a cage.
You’ve locked your emotions up and pretend to be a “strong man” when you’re hurting inside and barely holding it together.
Or maybe even worse you’re completely unaware of this – and you don’t even feel this pain anymore since it’s been locked away in a cage for so long.
You bought into the story that big boys don’t show emotion or even cry (an entirely human emotion).
When a man does this he shuts down a piece of his heart and becomes less human and more of a robot programmed by society.
Crying is a natural thing humans do no different than urinating. If you don’t urinate you’re in pain. When you urinate the pain is gone – it’s that simple.
It’s a release that is a necessary requirement for healthy living.
“Expose yourself to your deepest fear; after that, fear has no power, and the fear of freedom shrinks and vanishes. You are free.” – Jim Morrison
Emotionally handicap men become distant, angry, frustrated and apathetic.
Friendships and relationships feel more and more like chores. When someone asks how you’re doing you reply with superficial answers to avoid expressing how you really feel.
“I’m alright, good, great, fine”… then you quickly turn the conversation back to them.
When a man is disconnected from his heart, he becomes disconnected from the rest of the world.
A men’s coach makes you emotionally healthy so you can connect deeply with other men and women and participate in the joys of connection and love to the fullest.
Your men’s coach unlocks your emotional cage so you finally experience what true freedom means.
8. Going through life without strong male support.
I don’t mean your boys you throw back beers and shots of tequila with every weekend but men who you can share your truth with.
Often men go their entire lives without close male friends who are supportive – which means they are living on the surface layer and going through life alone.
Men are typically scared to approach the male friends they do have in fear of judgment or thinking they’ll just say “Come on, just be a man!” or something that doesn’t help at all.
Show me a man who can’t connect with another man, and I’ll show you a sad, borderline depressed and lonely man.
Humans need to connect at a deep level to be emotionally free and healthy.
Women do it more than men do as it’s more accepted in society, yet men still need to do it as well.
And it’s no wonder that according to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention the suicide rate for men is 3.5x higher than women.
This is a very real social problem that people aren’t talking about and men aren’t even aware of themselves.
Do you have men in your life that you can share the good, the bad and the ugly with who will listen and support you?
Can you be vulnerable and share what’s really going on with other men without being scrutinized?
Men who live in the world of truths tend to be more connected to the world and those around them and find more joy, happiness, and fulfillment.
9. You believe being a “strong” man means you can’t ask for help.
We’ve been taught to believe that what makes you a man is your ability to figure things out on your own.
The ego is the enemy here, and it’s quite obvious, and women get a good laugh out of it.
You don’t want to ask for help at the cost of looking “weak” so you’d rather spend more money, time and energy trying to figure something out on your own rather than just asking for help from someone who has an answer and more experience than you do.
- How is a white belt ever supposed to become a black belt without asking for help…?
- How is a student ever supposed to master the subject without asking questions…?
- How could Rocky face Apollo Creed without asking for Mic’s help…?
What makes you a strong man is your ability to admit that you can’t do it alone, you don’t know everything – and even if you could or did, how boring would that be to get to the top of a hill and find yourself all alone.
Wouldn’t you want to celebrate with others who have supported you all along?
Imagine celebrating your 50th birthday, and you have people canceling last minute, and very few people show up to celebrate your life with you…
Asking for help from a men’s coach isn’t a sign of weakness… your coach won’t judge or belittle you… you get a partner with only your best interest at heart and tap into the true power that lies within.
10. You are playing too small, and you know it – but no one can tell.
You tell yourself as long as I’m keeping up with the Jones’ then who am I to try and push for more.
You played big for a period of time and reached a level of stability and comfort… then just stopped.
The problem is that nothing is happening in your life. Life feels like Groundhog Day – You’ve become very complacent even if you are doing well by societies standards. You’ve stopped giving it your all.
When you play small, you stop growing – and as Tony Robbins says “if you aren’t growing you’re dying.”
There is less gusto, fight and vigor in a man when he’s playing small. Deep down inside the man loses respect for himself and often falls victim to the quick hits of instant gratification that society offers alcohol, drugs, entertainment to keep his mind occupied.
This is never allowed with a men’s coach.
In fact, you’ll hate your men’s coach at times because he pushes you to do things you never thought you’d do. On the other hand… you experience a life you never thought you could.
You may say “Screw him! I hate that guy, and I’m not doing this anymore!
But you’ll come to realize that you’re just retreating into old habits and you know he’s right. That you know, he stands for your greatness and is only supporting you.
Your excuses won’t work with him, so you’ll have no other option but to take appropriate action, be consistent and reap the benefits of becoming a stronger grounded man.
A man who plays harder and wins even bigger!
When a man plays harder, he is more masculine, attractive and respected by others around him and most importantly himself.
There’s a new breed of coaches that stand for men. I’ve yet to meet a woman who wasn’t excited and supportive of men who take advantage of a coach.
Men’s Coaches give men the power to become stronger grounded men, so they enjoy more happiness, love and freedom in their lives, businesses and relationships.
Men’s coaches help men and women benefit too because they get to be with a strong, grounded man. A man focused on his purpose, fighting his fight, a lover of women and a man of integrity.
There is a powerful man deep inside of you that has been suppressed for far too long.
So what are you going to do about it? Stick your head in the sand and convince yourself that all of the truths I’ve shared is just a bunch of new age BS…?
…or square your shoulders, set your jaw and do the hardest and most rewarding thing… ask for guidance and become the hero you know you are!
It’s time to lead.
This is a call to all men – to be great!
To rise up and shatter the bonds society has trapped us in.
From this point forward you are going to stand on this earth as a strong, grounded man.
We can and will do better.
It isn’t too late to take a stand in our own lives and be the hero of our own adventure once again.
Yes, it is a scary journey, but you don’t have to do it alone. There are men out there who will stand for your greatness and help you rise.
Are you ready to unleash the powerful man inside you and rise to the greatness you deserve?
Learn more about the men’s group coaching services and private community Knowledge For Men offers here.
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