Understanding women and knowing what they want in a relationship have dumbfounded men for millennia.
Yes, men are often baffled by their girlfriends and unsure how to keep them truly happy. If you’ve found yourself second-guessing her and yourself at every turn, you’re not alone in your strife.
Healthy, long-standing relationships don’t happen by accident. Forget what you’ve seen in movies — screw ‘When Harry Met Sally’ or ‘You’ve Got Mail’. Rom-coms give false narratives and notions of happily ever after that don’t work in the real world.
As a relationship coach for men, I’ve seen too many men fall for these lies.
You think that dating should be easy and — if you show a woman a little attention — she will fall in love instantly. We all know that isn’t true.
If you want to find a relationship that serves you, you need to learn how to please women.
How to Establish a High-Quality Romantic Relationship That Stands the Test of Time
Every man out there wants a high-quality relationship. If you’re stuck in a rut, chasing women all of the time, you need a reality check.
Here’s the cold, hard truth: You shouldn’t have to beg women to give you the time of day. That is a pathetic way to start a relationship — it doesn’t put you on an equal footing.
She will always believe that she is better than you and that you are unworthy… and how can you blame her for that? You’ve shown her that you will do anything for her.
It’s time to switch up the narrative. When you have become the most successful version of yourself, you will find that women start to chase you.
You shouldn’t waste your time following women around and trying to get their attention. It’s all about working on yourself, elevating your position, and establishing yourself as a true alpha.
Once you’ve won that battle, finding a relationship that suits your lifestyle and long-term goals is straightforward.
Working on yourself is the first step toward improving your relationship with women. No woman wants a man who doesn’t have his life together. Why would they?
Why would a woman settle for a ‘work in progress’ when they can have the complete package? It’s not rocket science. The lesson here is simple: When you start working toward personal growth, you will find success with women.
No matter what success you currently have in relationships, there is time to turn things around. Working with the experts will help you better understand yourself and the women you date. Watch our client orientation to get started.
What Women Want from Relationships and How to Give It To Them
Look, there’s no secret formula to getting women. Let’s start out by saying that.
Sure, PUAs will tell you that you can ‘trick’ women into bed. You can. But you can’t ‘trick’ them into having a quality relationship with you.
One-night stands are fine. However, when you are ready for a real, long-term relationship, you need to put in the groundwork.
It’s all about getting into the psyche of women. Understanding what they want is easier than you think. Contrary to popular belief, women’s needs aren’t a mystery.
There are some fundamental desires that all women share — no matter who they are or where they come from.
If you can fulfill her needs, she will stick by your side for years to come. Of course, if you fail to meet the basic requirements, she will leave you for someone who can. In this article, I will reveal the things that women are searching for in men.
1. Make Sure That She Is Satisfied in the Bedroom
Women love sex as much as men do. However, they don’t always get what they want.
If you’re climaxing every time and she never even gets close, chances are, she won’t be up for it all that often. One of the biggest mistakes men make is presuming that their girlfriend doesn’t enjoy sex. Are you even a good lover?
A massive 44% of men don’t know where the clitoris is. The main function of the clit is female pleasure. Ignoring it is a colossal error. Let’s put that into perspective for a moment: Almost half of the men aren’t hitting the right spot with women.
Too many men fail to please their women in the bedroom.
If you want to elevate your relationship, learn about female anatomy and quit watching pornography. If you’re worried your girlfriend is faking it, improve your skills.
Communication is the secret ingredient in satisfying sex. Have you ever asked her what she likes in the bedroom? All women are different, and they enjoy different things. Having a hot chat about what she’s into is the way to go. No one knows her body as she does.
Sex matters. Sure, some people can have lasting relationships without having satisfying sex lives, but that is rare. Many men don’t make their girlfriend’s satisfaction a priority and that is a real shame.
However, it means that setting yourself apart from other men isn’t hard. Putting the effort in here makes a big difference to the connection you have with her.
2. Always Speak to Her as the Equal She Is
Equality is the name of the game.
It’s no secret that women are striving to be seen as equal. It’s a long road and it’s not over yet. This battle creates a problem for men.
We are not equipped to understand what women go through on a daily basis. Worse still, if we claim to be in the loop, we are quickly told that we’re ‘mansplaining’ things. It should come as no surprise that almost
30% of men think that progress toward gender equality has come at a personal expense to them.
Show her that you understand by treating her like an equal. Consider how you speak to women. Do you talk down to them? Do you automatically presume that you know more than them? Do you over-explain simple things to them? You might not be conscious of these things. However, all too many men treat women as ‘less’ because of their gender.
Conversations require mutual respect. Whenever you’re speaking to your girlfriend, remember that she is an intelligent, independent person. Talk to her as an equal.
3. Attention and Affection — in Equal Measures
Talk is cheap. The things you say are meaningless if you don’t have the action to back them up. Don’t just tell your girlfriend that you care about her — show her every day.
Small gestures go a big way. It might be a kiss before she leaves the house. It might be stroking her hair when she is tired. It could even be giving her a hug when she is down. All of these simple, kind gestures show that you care about her and value her as a partner.
When you first meet a woman, you might not be able to keep your hands off her. You will shower her with attention and affection from the start.
However, as time winds on, you could tire of this and begin to become lazy in your relationship. If you want to drive her wild and keep her coming back for more, never let up. Keep the attention coming her way.
4. You Need to Accept Her for Who She Is
“To be fully seen by somebody, then, and be loved anyhow — this is a human offering that can border on miraculous.” — Elizabeth Gilbert
Humans are flawed. You won’t find the perfect woman because she doesn’t exist.
We all have deep-seated issues that stem from our childhoods. Your girlfriend may struggle with depression, anxiety, ADHD, or any other mental health problem. She may be terrible with money, find it hard to commit to things, or have the poorest time-keeping skills.
Whatever her flaws are, you have a duty to accept them. Trying to change her will get you nowhere fast. In mature relationships, you should accept each other.
Accepting that she is flawed will help you love her more fully. When we stop demanding so much from the people that we love, our relationships run smoothly.
The fact of the matter is that you’re not a perfect person. You have your own set of challenges that you are working to overcome. She is exactly the same. Trust that she is also working on things.
5. Work on Your Own Emotional Maturity
Are you emotionally mature? Before you can establish a high-quality relationship, you need to learn this lesson. Stop stumbling through life and letting your emotions lead you.
Women don’t want to date man-children. When a woman is searching for a partner, she wants someone who has it all figured out.
She needs someone who can understand how to be emotionally mature and care for her in a deep way. That doesn’t happen overnight. You will have had to have put in the work before you meet her so you can get it right.
The American Psychological Association defines emotional maturity as “a high and appropriate level of emotional control and expression.”
Men who are emotionally mature don’t get jealous, angry, or upset at the first sight of trouble. They know how to hold themselves together.
When there are problems within the relationship, they work to solve them. These men don’t blow up at their girlfriends or get into rage-fueled arguments. They are calm, capable, and loving toward them instead.
Do you have anger problems? Are you jealous in your relationship? Do you find it hard to talk about your emotions? If you are saying yes, yes, and yes, you need to change your ways. The answer is simple.
Research suggests that emotional maturity and self-esteem go hand-in-hand. If you have low levels of confidence, you will struggle with your emotions.
6. Admit When You Have Screwed Things Up
Men are rarely taught to say ‘sorry’. But we all screw up. When you’ve made a mistake, your girlfriend needs you to admit it and then apologize. It’s that straightforward.
Your ego is standing in the way of you having a good relationship. If you’ve done something wrong, your gut will tell you to hide away from it. Maybe you will refuse to admit that there is a problem.
Maybe you will say that it was her fault. Maybe you will look for a scapegoat to take the blame for you. Whatever your tactics, they have to stop now.
It takes a real man to admit that he has messed up. There is nothing more attractive to women than a guy who can say “You know what? I made a mistake there and I am sorry.”
It shows that he is willing to grow and change with time. Learning to reflect on your actions and adapt your behavior is a huge step. It’s not easy but it’s worth your time.
Life is not ‘Being John Malkovich’. You can’t climb inside women’s heads and understand them from the inside. However, you can start to know what women want.
In this article, I’ve covered some of the basics to help you start establishing the high-quality relationship you deserve right now. All of these things require you to have a high level of confidence and become the alpha you were born to be.
Join my exclusive coaching program and learn how to be the strongest version of yourself – supported by a selection of like-minded men, the coaching community will give you insights into the female psyche while showing you how to level up your life. Take control of your life right now.
When you understand how to keep women coming back for more, it can be a real game-changer. The truth is that it doesn’t take a lot of work to master this art.
No matter what success you currently have in relationships, there is time to turn things around. Working with the experts will help you better understand yourself and the women you date.