22: Todd Valentine: From Hopeless Romantic to International Leader in Dating and Lifestyle Design


While Todd Valentine finished his final year as an undergraduate university mechanical engineering student at Union College in Albany, New York, he decided to enroll in Real Social Dynamics Live Programs.

After participating in several Real Social Dynamics programs, Todd took time off from university to move into the Project Hollywood Mansion, and he soon proved he was very quick learner. Being so dedicated to the company, Todd was given the nickname Xaneus and was invited to enroll in the Executive Coach training program.

As a player in an international amateur soccer league, a skilled martial artist, and avid participant in chess and cross country events, Todd focuses his lifestyle on developing a strong balanced focus between maintaining a high level of health and building strong relationships.

Favorite Success Quote

“I can accept failing, but I can’t accept not trying.” – Michael Jordan

Key Points

1. Women Are Just Like Everyone Else

There is something strange that happens inside most men’s head when they see a beautiful woman.

They immediately put her in a position of power where she is this mythical creature unlike anything else in the world.

But the simple fact is that women, even the most beautiful women are just like everyone else.

They have the same struggles, doubts, and insecurities as the rest of the world.

If you want to succeed with women, you need to knock them off the mental pedestal upon which you have placed them.

2. Regret the Things that You Have Done Not the Things You Wish You’d Done 

In life there are only two kinds of regrets.

The regret of doing something and the regret of not doing something.

And at the end of the day, it is better to live a life where you regret making mistakes then a life where you regret not taking action.

At the end of the day, when all is said and done, how do you want to look back on your life?

Do you want to regret not talking to that girl, do you want to regret not starting that business, do you want to regret not living life on your terms?

Or do you want to regret a few bad decisions that ended up hurting yourself or someone else?

It is much better to live with the regret of a bad decision than the regret of inaction.

3. Take Pain and Discomfort in the Moment Over Pain in the Long Term

No matter what you want to achieve, whether it is success in business, success with women, or success in your health, it is going to be uncomfortable, it is going to be painful. 

But you have a choice.

You can either embrace the pain and discomfort in the moment or live with the pain and regret of inaction for the rest of your life.

What is more painful, forcing yourself to get better with women and facing rejection? Or doing nothing and living the rest of your life alone or in an unfulfilling relationship?

What is more painful? Quitting your job and struggling financially for a few years until you achieve success? Or being miserable for the rest of your life because you were unwilling to take a chance?

What is more painful? Going to the gym and taking care of your health now? Or the pain and discomfort of sickness and disease later.

You are going to be uncomfortable one way or another.

But it’s up to you what kind of pain and discomfort you will endure.

4. Learn to Stimulate Women Emotionally 

If you want to have true success with women, then you need to learn to stimulate their emotions.

Instead of being the bland, boring, vanilla guy who just kisses ass and tells them how beautiful they are, be the guy who challenges them, who creates your own little world with them, and who elicits an emotional response (good or bad) in everyone that they meet.

The world is full of boring people, especially boring men.

Don’t be one of them.

5. Your Weakest Link Will Always Determine Your Results

In business, relationships, and life, your weakest link will always determine your results.

If you are great at sales but terrible at marketing, your business will suffer.

If you are great on the phone, but terrible in person, your game will suffer.

If you are great at lifting weights, but get winded walking up the steps, your health will suffer.

Become well rounded and always seek to shore up your weakest links.

Because they will ultimately determine your results.

Most Influential Books

Influence by Robert Cialdini

Making People Talk by Bary Farber

The Hustler by Paul Newman

Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand

The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle

Next Steps

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