112: Max Nachamkin: Building Relationships with Social Circles

Max Nachamkin is an entrepreneur, dating and life coach. He runs the dating blogs inner gladiator and maxnachamkin.com, which focus on social mastery and dating for entrepreneurs. His teachings all center around his belief that dating high quality women is one of the keys to success in both life and business.

Favorite Success Quote

“There are no experts, just people who have been winging it for longer than you have.” – Jeffery Platts

Key Points

1. You Are Totally Worthy 

In this very moment, as you are reading this page, you are completely worthy.

No amount (or lack) of money, fame, or status will change this.

You are worthy just as you are.

You have everything that you need inside of you to attract the beautiful women into your life and achieve your goals.

This isn’t to say that you will not need to make changes, alter your habits, and create new belief systems.

But you are worthy just the way you are.

So as my friend Hal Elrod says, “Love the life you have while you create the life of your dreams.”

2. Constantly Question Your Own Beliefs 

We all have beliefs that are not serving us.

We all have ways of thinking that are detracting from our success and happiness.

But how many of us ever actually take the time to question those beliefs?

How many of us examine our beliefs and figure out if they are true and if they are really serving our goals and purpose?

For example, some of you believe that you just aren’t good with women.

Is this belief really valid?

Has there ever been an interaction with a woman that flowed smoothly?

Have you had any experiences in your life that would suggest your belief is inaccurate?

If so, then you must eradicate this belief and form a new one.

So “I am no good with women” turns into “I can learn to be good with women”.

This is a much more empowering way to live and go through life.

3. Ask for Help and Get Support 

If you are facing any challenge in your life, then you need to ask for help and get support.

Surround yourself with men who can strengthen and support you, men who can help you to grow, and men who can hold you accountable.

Life is not a solo sport.

It is meant to be played with others.

If you want to make the most out of life, achieve your goals at a faster pace, and have more joy and freedom, then you must find someone who will hold you accountable.

Whether they are a coach, a friend, or a mentor, we all need people in our lives who call us out on our b.s. and lift us to higher levels.

4. If You Want a Great Relationship Your Values Must Match 

If you want to build a thriving, lasting relationship, then your values must match.


You cannot sustain a relationship when you value entrepreneurship, personal growth, and health and your girlfriend values drinking and partying.

You must find someone whose values match your own.

This does not mean that they must share every interest and hobby that you have, but they need to match with you on the important things.

If you have strong religious beliefs, she should probably share those.

If you value hard work and ambition, then you cannot be in a relationship with a small minded and petty person.

5. Focus on Your Social Circle Not Your Game 

If you really want to start meeting more women and have an abundant dating life, then you shouldn’t focus on your game, you should focus on your social circle.

Start simply.

Throw a dinner party with 3 friends and tell each of them to invite at least one friend and one girl friend.

Do what you need to do to host a great party and then tell everyone that you will be throwing another party next week.

Again, they have to bring at least one friend.

If you continue doing this, you will meet dozens of beautiful women, you will be the center of attention (since you hosted the party) and if you have mutual friends, odds are good that many of your values and interests will align.

If you want to rapidly grow your social circle and meet beautiful women who are aligned with you and your mission, then this is the closest thing to a “short cut” that you will find.

Influential Books

The Emperors Handbook by Marcus Aurelius

Give and Take by Adam Grant


Connect with Max Nachamkin


The Times Have Changed. This is the Way Forward in 2024.

Here’s how I can help in my new FREE training on becoming a stronger Grounded Man:

1. The new path for men that creates a purpose driven life and doesn’t require you to lose your personal power, put women on a pedestal or sacrifice your goals.

2. Why men consistently settle and ignore the most important areas of life like the quality of their intimate relationships, social life and happiness and how to optimize all three without sacrificing professional growth.

3. The biggest mistake 97% of men make that breeds loneliness, breakups and emasculation that is absolutely reversible with this counter intuitive strategy.