“You must be over six feet tall” has become a meme in the dating world. Virtually every man has heard, either from women or other men, that height matters. And, if you listen to the buzz, being six feet tall is the “gold standard.”
If you listened to these people, you’d swear that anyone who isn’t six feet tall would end up single for life. Obviously, this is not true. Shorter men get dates all the time. But this doesn’t mean there isn’t a reason to feel insecure about your height.
Our society has a way of making men feel worthless if they are not taller than everyone else. While taller men can have some advantages in the dating scene, the truth is that it’s not something most women care about.
Do women like tall men?
Yes, women generally like tall men. Tall guys tend to have more dating options and are perceived as more masculine.
Around 48 to 55 percent of all women prefer taller men, or more specifically, they will only date a man taller than them. Needless to say, it’s easy for men to envy taller guys simply because they have a larger pool of interested women to choose from.
However, there is more to this preference than meets the eye.
Why do women like tall men?
Contrary to popular belief, there is no real biological reason for this. It’s mostly a social and psychological thing.
Taller men tend to be seen as more masculine and protective. Some women also tend to like the idea of feeling more delicate than their partners.
From a dominance perspective, women may see taller men as more powerful in their unconscious brains. After all, they can’t help but look up to a taller man. Evolutionary psychology also suggests that taller men indicate better health and intellect.
Since male height can be a sign of proper nutrition, better physical protection and better intellectual development as kids, it makes sense that dating preferences often skew taller. It’s a biological thing in many ways, but it’s not just biological.
Tall males with shorter women also tend to be more socially accepted. For women who care about the approval of others, that small detail can make a big difference in how interested they are. Besides, they like wearing high heels without worrying about towering over their partners.
Another side to being attracted to tall men is only starting to show up now.
Many shorter men have started to feel hurt or insecure over their height, especially when they are on dating apps. This is known as height insecurity, and like any other type of insecurity, it can push you into behaving unattractively.
Sadly, modern women often have had bad experiences with shorter guys who take out their height insecurity on them. Many women have been cornered by disgruntled dates accusing them of being shallow or hating their dates because of their height. Reading stories of other women who experienced it can put women off short men.
Aggressive behavior as a reaction to insecurity terrifies women from all walks of life. It’s not attractive. As a result, some women prefer tall men simply because being with a tall guy reduces the chances of having this kind of nightmarish gaffe happen to them.
Being short doesn’t mean that you have to resign yourself to singledom.
While it’s true that most women preferred tall men, the truth is that this isn’t as big of a deal as most men make it out to be. The average height of a man is 5’8–well under the commonly-cited “minimum” of six feet.
Obviously, if shorter guys never got dates, our population would be bottlenose. Being short may not be ideal, but that doesn’t mean you’re doomed.
In dating, your best strategy is to improve what you can control and accept what you can’t.
The most challenging question for many men is, “How can I compete with tall guys? Moreover, how can I still attract women when women favor tallness?” There are a couple of tips that can help you out.
1. Remember, “tall” is in the eye of the beholder
What one woman considers tall isn’t going to be tall to others. Tall women prefer taller men than short women do. For example, if she’s 6’1, she probably will want to date someone 6’3 or taller.
On the other hand, shorter women might find six feet to be a bit too tall for them. Studies suggest that women prefer men approximately eight inches taller than them, while men prefer three inches shorter.
The bottom line? If you have a height difference between you and your date, she’ll still be able to enjoy her height preferences, and you’ll still enjoy your romantic partner. Sometimes, choosing to date shorter is an intelligent strategy.
2. It’s important to prioritize women who prefer you.
There is something incredibly disheartening about being rejected for a trait you possess that is not in your control. After all, you can lose weight but can’t magically grow an inch or two. And yet, men are expected to take it in stride–as they should!
But let’s be honest here. Do you want to date someone who has no interest in actually getting to know you as a person if you are not the right height for them? Doesn’t that strike you as a bit shallow?
Truth be told, as nice as it is to have a larger dating pool to select from, the fact is that it doesn’t make it easy to figure out who you’re truly compatible with.
When women reject you for something shallow that you can’t control, they’re showing you that they would probably drop you for other similar things, such as hair loss.
If you are looking for a genuine connection, women who only date tall guys probably aren’t. Consider it a bullet dodged!
3. Height is not a personality trait; personality is what women genuinely prefer.
It sounds hackneyed, but it’s true.
Tall men may have a sexual advantage, but your personality makes or breaks your fate when it comes to long-term relationships.
Plenty of tall, gangly men can never talk to women or get a date. They are often angry, bitter, or simply have a toxic attitude towards dating and women. In many cases, they are desperate or use abusive techniques to attract women.
When push comes to shove, women prefer men who they feel would be good partners. While online dating apps may filter you out by height, you don’t need to be a tall man to woo women in the club or at parties.
A good sense of humor, a masculine approach to life that focuses on pursuing your goals, and a lifestyle you enjoy will give you confidence. Trying to get painful surgeries to increase your height or trying to compare yourself to others will not.
In other words, stop focusing on height so much. Being a tall guy doesn’t matter.
Focus on the good you bring to the table and how you can make your life something women would want to be a part of.
4. Focus on what you actually can change.
If you were to listen to some of the more toxic parts of the internet, you might as well give up on dating if you’re not one of the tall men on a fashion runway. Don’t listen to that advice, and cut people out who encourage you to wallow in that self-pity.
A man who takes care of himself has a great sense of humor, and is willing to put himself out there is always going to have the advantage over a tall guy who does little to better his situation.
Eating well, hitting the gym, creating a great life, and keeping yourself looking well-kept are essential.
More importantly, you shouldn’t do it just to attract women. You should be doing all those things for yourself.
Dating is not always fair. Some men are going to have advantages over others. However, that doesn’t mean you can’t work your way to a better life and make yourself attractive to the right type of woman. Effort trumps natural looks almost every time.
Gain an edge over others with the right guidance.
Dating is one of the most competitive things a man can ever experience, and if you are short, you have the chips stacked against you. Even if you like your women shorter, you may feel nervous about approaching anyone if you are affected by height insecurity.
Navigating dating can be brutal, especially when dealing with personal issues arising from things you can’t always fix. At Knowledge for Men, we help you navigate this by using our own life experiences to guide you.
Our program is there to help you get rid of your insecurities, gain confidence in yourself, and also learn how to attract that perfect long-term relationship you’ve always wanted. Give our program a shot if you’re ready to make the most of your love life. It’s not for the faint of heart.