295: Zachary Stockill: Overcome Retroactive Jealousy and Experience Truly Fulfilling Relationships

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Zachary Stockill is a writer, developer, podcaster, and lifelong student.

His work has been featured on The Huffington Post, The Art of Charm, and ManTalks among many others.

Favorite Success Quote

The so-called meaning of life opened up before me, it turned out to be infinitely simple, give love and seek no reward reciprocal love is your reward and the meaning of life in its entirety.” ~ Andrei Gavrilov

Key Points

1. Generosity without Expectation is Sexy 

There is a lot of focus in the modern “pick up” and dating advice world on making sure that you are always giving less in your relationships than you are receiving.

While this advice may have some foundation if you are looking for nothing other than a one-night stand or a slew of unfulfilling sexual experiences, it holds no water if you are looking for fulfillment in relationships.

If you want to have the most fulfilling relationships possible, you need to give love without expectation.

That is the key.

Give and don’t expect anything in return. Give because you want to, not because you are expecting sex or love to be reciprocated.

2. Tell Your Truth No Matter What 

If you are struggling in your relationships, odds are, you are withholding your truth from your woman.

You need to open up, tell her the truth, be honest with her without fear of outcome and without any neediness from her.

This is the only way that you can overcome issues together and break through jealousy.

3. You Need to be Aware of Women’s Sexuality 

Odds are, if you are struggling with jealousy, at least a small part of the issue is that you are not celebrating women’s sexuality.

Like men, women enjoy sex. They find it exciting and (hopefully) satisfying. And this is a beautiful thing.

Instead of sitting around in your relationships getting caught up on  the men who came before you, celebrate the fact that you are in a relationship with a beautiful sexual being, and learn to be ok with the fact that you probably weren’t her first and may not be her last.

4. Jealousy is About You, not Your Partner

Anyone who is struggling with jealousy on a large scale is almost definitely struggling with their own personal development.

Jealousy stems from your own limiting beliefs.

Your belief that you are not good enough, that you will never find a woman as good as your current girlfriend, or that other men will be able to care for her and satisfy her better than you will.

If you are struggling with these thoughts, then man up and take action.

Start taking care of yourself first. Master your own personal growth and become a man of high value who has options, and you will be able to sit back and enjoy as the

5. Maintain Your Life Outside of Relationships

The key to a healthy relationship is highly counter-intuitive.

Focus on your life outside of your relationship.

If you give up on your friends, quit pursuing your hobbies, and drop all of the things that made her fall in love with you in the first place, then your relationship is doomed.

You need to remember that you have a life outside of your woman. This will help keep you grounded whenever your relationship hits rocky ground (which is will).

Influential Books

1. Meditations by Marcus Aurelius

2. Sex at Dawn by Chris Ryan

3. The Book on the Taboo Against Knowing Who you Are by Allan Watts

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Connect with Zachary Stockill

retroactivejealousy.com

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