54: Mark Manson: Attract Women with Brutal Honesty & Vulnerability

Mark Manson is a blogger, entrepreneur, and world traveler. Since 2007, he’s been consulting with men on their emotional and psychological issues. He’s worked with thousands of men from nine different countries and given talks in over 25 different cities worldwide.

Mark has been a digital nomad since 2009. He has visited/lived in over 50 different countries and currently speaks three languages. He currently resides in Sao Paulo, Brazil.

Favorite Success Quote

“You’ll worry less about what people think about you when you realize how seldom they do.” — David Foster Wallace

Key Points

1. No One is Watching You 

We all live our lives like we are being watched.

We think that the pretty girl in line at Starbucks is judging us for the wrinkles on our shirts and that the rich guys driving the Ferrari behind us in traffic are secretly laughing at our 20 year old Honda.

But the truth is… You are not that important.

People just don’t care about you enough to waste their time thinking about what you are doing.

They are spending their time worrying about how others view them and feeling insecure about their own shortcomings.

The sooner you realize this, the sooner you can achieve real freedom.

No one is watching you, so stop living like they are.

Just enjoy your life, stop worying about who is judging you or what they think.

Because the simple truth of the matter is that they are too caught up in their own world to even give you a second thought.

2. Let Your Authentic Self Loose

If you want to be wildly attractive to women, not all women, but the right women, then you need to let your authentic self loose.

Be who you are, completely and unapologetic ally.

Don’t try and change to please others.

Speak your mind, state your opinion, be honest and vulnerable, and the right women will respond to you.

If you are constantly living for other people, not only will you attract the wrong people into your life, but you will also lack confidence and security in who you are as a man because you know that you are not living your authentic truth.

3. Express Your Love for Someone Today 

Is there someone in your life today who you love but have not expressed your love for them in a while (or ever)?

Maybe it’s your girlfriend, a childhood buddy, or a family member.

Whoever it is, I want you to pick up the phone right now and send them a text telling them how much you appreciate them and all that they have done for you.

I don’t care if you think this is sappy or cheesy.

Do it!

And do it now!

I promise you that as soon as you send that message you will feel a weight lifted off your shoulders and a sense of peace that you have not felt in a long time.

So take action, be a man, and express your love now!

4. Be Accountable to Other People But not a Slave to Them 

It is easy to fall into one of two extremes in life.

You can either be a slave to others or you can totally disregard their feelings in lieu of your own.

But life is best lived on the middle ground.

Instead of constantly worrying about others and what they think and trying to live your life for other people, be accountable to them.

Instead of giving everyone else a single finger salute and driving off into the distance, treat others the way that you want to be treated without pandering to them.

Live life for yourself and work towards your goals, but always be kind and courteous to others.

5. It’s Either a Hell Yes or a Hell No

If you are making an important decision in life, it can only be one of two things… Hell yes or hell no.

If it’s not a hell yes, it’s a hell no.

If you are thinking about marrying your girlfriend and it’s not a hell yes… it’s a hell no.

If you are thinking about taking a job in a new city and it’s not a hell yes, then it’s a hell no.

All of life’s biggest questions can be boiled down to this simple truth.

If it’s not a hell yes, then don’t do it.


Influential Books

No More Mr. Nice Guy by Dr. Robert Glover

Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand

War and Peace by Leo Tolstoy

Connect with Mark Manson


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