238: Ryan Michler: Move Towards Your Purpose & Master Your Life

Ryan Michler is the founder of the Order of Man blog and podcast which helps men to master the 8 core areas of their life. He is also the founder of his own financial planning firm and a veteran of the Iraqi war.

Favorite Success Quote

“I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, and most of them never happened”~Mark Twain

Key Points

1. Most of Your Fears Will Never Be Realized 

Something that most men never realize until it is too late, is that most of the things that they fear will never come to fruition, and lead lives of quiet desperation, paralyzed by fear, and unable to take action.

Odds are, if you start that business you won’t go bankrupt, if you take that trip you won’t get kidnapped and murdered, if you ask that girl out you won’t get wine splashed on your face and cursed out.

Most of your fears are completely irrational and will never actually happen. Realize this, take the steps necessary to mitigate risks, and GET ON LIVING!

2. Who Are You Not to Start?

One of the questions that inevitably comes up for most men whenever they look to start a business, improve their body, or their dating lives is

“Who am I to do this?”

Let me ask you a better question

“Who are you not to do this?”

Are you really so selfish that you would rob the world of your gifts, talents, and abilities out of fear? Are you really so selfish that you would rob your family, your friends, and your country of the amazing changes and difference that you can bring about simply because you don’t feel worthy?

How dare you even consider keeping your gifts inside of you! You have a responsibility to share yourself and your gifts with the world, in fact, you cannot be a “real” man until you do so.

3. Take Small Steps to Get Where You Want 

Whenever you have a big goal, it’s easy to get frustrated and overwhelmed with how far you are from your goal. But the simple way to get around this frustration is to take small daily action.

If you want to start a business, begin by simply writing on your blog every night for an hour after work, if you want to get in better shape, start by doing 10 pushups every morning and adding one each day, if you want to get better with women, start by just casually talking to girls in line at the grocery store.

Your goals don’t have to be big and scary. Start small and keep taking daily actions and you will get there.

5. Self Mastery is About Virtue 

Often times, people wonder what the meaning of self master is, and simply put, it’s about mastering virtue.

It’s about integrity and doing the right thing even when it’s hard. It’s about saying no to watching porn even though you want to, about saying no to having another drink despite the jeers of your social circle, it’s about staying faithful to your spouse, and it’s about doing what you said you would do no matter what.

Influential Books

1. Extreme Ownership by Jocko Willing

2. Wild at Heart by John Eldridge


Connect with Ryan Michler


The Times Have Changed. This is the Way Forward in 2024.

Here’s how I can help in my new FREE training on becoming a stronger Grounded Man:

1. The new path for men that creates a purpose driven life and doesn’t require you to lose your personal power, put women on a pedestal or sacrifice your goals.

2. Why men consistently settle and ignore the most important areas of life like the quality of their intimate relationships, social life and happiness and how to optimize all three without sacrificing professional growth.

3. The biggest mistake 97% of men make that breeds loneliness, breakups and emasculation that is absolutely reversible with this counter intuitive strategy.