15: Robbie Kramer: Face Your Fears, Become a Social Genius and Get the Life You Want


Robbie Kramer is the founder of Innerconfidence.com, where he helps men improve their love lives and become social geniuses through information products, live trainings and image make overs.

Favorite Success Quote

“Change happens outside of your comfort zone.” – Robbie Kramer

Key Points

1. “Game” Will Only Get You So Far 

Lots of guys get caught up in the game of meeting and seducing women.

They think that a few simple hacks and lines of conversation are all that they need to achieve success with women and in relationships.

But these tactics and tricks will only get you so far.

Sure you might be able to find a woman who is desperate for attention and affection and use these games to get laid.

But how long will it last?

How sustainable is it really?

It’s not.

The only way to achieve real success in your relationships is to work on yourself and become a confident man from the inside out.

If you don’t have true confidence and inner game, then the cheesy pick up lines and physical escalation hacks will quickly fall short and you will be even more frustrated then you were before.

2. Confidence Requires a Holistic Approach to Life

If you want real confidence, you can’t just fake it.

You have to truly develop it from the inside out.


By regularly challenging yourself and putting yourself in more and more situations that validate the statement “I am a confident man.”

Go out and do things that scare you.

Make a list of things that you fear and then go and do them.

Scared of heights?

Go jump out of an airplane.

Scared of physical pain?

Go join a boxing gym and get punched in the face.

Scared of public speaking?

Go sign up for Toast Masters.

Once you start to regularly overcome your fears, you will become more confident in every area of life.

This confidence will permeate your interactions with women and make it much easier to spend time with and seduce the women that you truly desire.

3. Introduce Stakes Into Your Goals 

If you want to achieve your goals, then introduce stakes.

What do I mean by this.

Well, let’s say that you are scared of talking to women.

Hire a coach, give him your credit card number, and then tell him “I am going to approach one woman a day for the next week, and if I don’t, you get to charge my credit card for $1,000”

What are you more afraid of?

Having a 5 minute conversation with that cutie at Starbucks or losing enough money that you might not be able to pay rent?

The key to facing your fears is to introduce stakes that you are more afraid of.

4. Surround Yourself With People Who Are Better than You 

The quickest way to shortcut your success and achieve your goals is to surround yourself with people who are better than you in every area of life.

If you want to get better with women, go and hang out with the guys who are crushing it at the clubs.

If you want to get better in business, go hang out with young entrpreneurs who are absolutely dominating the game of business.

If you want to get better in your health, go talk to the biggest guy at the gym and ask him to be your workout partner.

Now some of you might wonder why these people would be willing to hang out with you.

First and foremost, you would be surprised at how much successful people love helping people at the bottom.

But sometimes you need something a little bit more.

In these situations you need to find a point of leverage.

Find a skill that you have that the other person doesn’t and use that to create a symbiotic relationship.

Maybe the guys at the club who are great with women need a web developer or someone who knows how to balance a checkbook.

Find ways that you can provide value to others and you will quickly build a social circle of individuals who are playing the game on a higher level than you.

5. Develop Freedom from Outcome with Women 

The quickest way to succeed with women is to stop giving a f*ck.

And this is easier said than done.

But when women meet a man who is unapologetic about who he is and what he wants and really doesn’t care about whether or not she likes him, magical things happen.

The quickest way to achieve this outcome independence  is to fail forward fast.

Go and get rejected by 100 women and you will quickly realize that it’s not the end of the world and you will rapidly develop a thick skin and no f*cks given attitude.

Influential Book

The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho


Connect with Robbie Kramer



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